Little Miss Sunshine [4/10]

Wow, my memory isn't what it used to be, but I cant remember a flick was more disappointing, that so completely failed to meet expectations, then this piece of crap. There was such a constant stream of absurdity, plot holes and nauseating pretentiousness that I probably had a "was that the dog or one of you?" grimace on my face for at least 80% of the movie. The only redeeming parts of this train wreck were Steve Carrel and Alan Arkin - even though I already knew most of Carrel's money lines thanks to worthless critics like Dana Stevens at Slate who can't write a review without quoting the best lines and giving away major plot points [note: this was before I decided to never again read a review if I have any desire to see a flick]. If the movie consisted entirely of their characters sitting in a coffee shop bullshitting for 90 minutes it would have been at least eight to nine times more enjoyable to watch - Alan Arkin especially, since all of the reviews I read barely mentioned him.

Proof [5/10]

I can't say for sure why it took me over ten years to realise that Gwyneth Paltrow is an absolutely atrocious actress, but I guess better late than never. Oh well. She definitely isn't helped by this film's horrible dialogue - perhaps it sounds better coming off a theatre stage - nor the fact that her character is 27 years old (and even younger in the numerous flashbacks). Oh and I'm not sure if it's always been the case, or was recently caused by living in gloomy London, but she is pasty to the point of translucency (which I can't say is attractive). Anyway, Blythe Danner's overrated offspring aside, the movie isn't half bad. Decent story and at least one or two interesting plot twists. And of course I have no qualms with Sir Anthony or the gay cowboy formerly known as Jake Gyllenhaal.

UHF [6/10]

I hadn't watched Weird Al's magnum opus since high school, but had a feeling that it might possibly be a little dated. Well I was wrong. It's way more than a little dated - plus pretty much the only scene that I remembered and actively referenced over the years (the Rambo sequence) wasn't nearly as funny as I'd remembered it being. It has its moments though, and is probably worth a rewatch every five to seven years. [note: I was shitty drunk when I watched it]

M.A.S.H. [7/10]

I've never actually seen the television show, but even though it came first the film seems like a poor imitation. It's like watching six randomly selected episodes - you have the Pilot, the Introduction of a New Quirky Character, the Hot Lips and Frank affair, the Suicide, the Japan Trip and the completely superfluous Football Game. However, Donald Sutherland and Elliot Gould are fucking great so I cant possibly give this any less than a 7.

Gimme Shelter [2/10]

Hey, what's an even better idea than getting a bunch of Hell's Angels to provide security at a Rolling Stones concert in the early 70s? How about filming Mick Jager watching footage of the event - at which all hell breaks loose between the notoriously responsible and well-mannered bikers and some feisty dirty hippies - 30 years later, and calling it a documentary. Sound like a great idea? No. No, it doesn't. It sounds like a fucking scam.